Over The Edge
by Black Twilight
Summary: Megumi and Kaoru's teasing goes way too far. Unfortunatley, at Sano and Kenshin's expense. Very random, CHAPTER 3 UP!
1. Over The Edge

Over The Edge - Chapter One  
by  
Black Twilight 

Kaoru stormed through the dojo like a violent storm. Sometimes that Megumi woman could just...urgh! Her remarks about Kenshin just drove her up the wall._ 'Oh well,'_ she thought, 'It doesn't matter as long as it doesn't bother Kenshin. Speak of the devil!' Outside she spotted his pink gi. She ran over to him.   
  
"Kenshin I..." She was surprised when it wasn't her rurouni. "Sano? What are you doing in Kenshin's clothes?"   
  
"Oh, um..." he blushed, "the brat thought it'd be funny if he painted my clothes to look like the rainbow. So I kind of stole this."   
  
She smiled as a thought struck her. Casually as possible Kaoru walked up to him. "I'm surprised you even fit in this outfit. You're so strong...muscular..." she complimented squeezing his arm. The she balanced on her toes to whisper in his ear, "...and so sexy."   
  
Through all this Megumi watched through angry eyes. _'Fine, I can play that way too.' _And with that she marched off to find poor Kenshin. 


	2. Megumi's Revenge

Over The Edge - Chapter Two  
  
by  
  
Black Twilight  
  
"Oh Ken-san!" she called sweetly. "Could you be a dear and come here a minute?"  
  
"Sure, Megumi-dono."  
  
"Ken-san, do you think it's a bit hot in here?"  
  
"Um, no. Not really I thi-." She cut him off.  
  
"Maybe you should take your gi off, hm? This weather is simply atrocious."  
  
The Megumi fainted...or so he thought. Kenshin rushed to her spot on the ground.  
  
"Megumi-dono! Are you alright? Can you move your-ACK! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"  
  
Kenshin tried to make an escape but she had a death-grip on his shirt. Poor Kenshin.  
  
"KAORU-DONO! HELP! KAORU-DONO! EEEEYYAA!!"  
  
Outside Kaoru was just about to kiss Sano, 'That would teach her that fox to never mess with a raccoon!'when she heard Kenshin's plea. To Sanosuke's immense relief she immediately dropped him arm and ran off.  
  
What she saw horrified her. 


	3. Leder Hosen and Twigs

Over The Edge - Chapter Two  
  
by  
  
Black Twilight  
  
Kaoru froze in the doorway. Megumi had Kenshin in a dog collar and was trying to push him into a cage. Meanwhile, Kenshin wasn't putting up much of a fight, only screaming like a school girl.   
  
She sighed. She didn't really want to hurt Megumi, but....  
  
"KAORU-DONO!! EEEEEE!!!!"  
  
Screw that! She wanted to rip her freaking head off! No one touches her rurouni without asking! She fumbled around for anything that looked like a weapon; a toilet plunger. 'Oh well' she thought.  
  
Megumi stopped and grabbed the thing nearest to her; a twig.   
  
"I will smite you! Beware the wrath of the almighty twig!"   
  
"I don't think so, formidable opponent. It is I who shall do the smiting!"  
  
"HUZZAH!" Kenshin yelled enthusiastically. They all sweatdropped. Why did they all have British accents anyway?  
  
"Doesn't matter," the author said. "Would you rather have German accents?"  
  
"Oh yes! Please!"  
  
ZAP!  
  
"Sprechen wir Deutsch? ((Are we speaking german?))"  
  
"Ich weiß nicht. Wie können wir erzählen? ((I dunno. How do we tell?))"  
  
"Ach Wartezeit! Leder hosen. ((Oh wait! Leather pants.))"  
  
They both giggled. 


	4. Several Hours Later & Some Sake

Over The Edge - Chapter Three  
  
by  
  
Black Twilight  
  
-------------------------------  
  
((Last Time.......))  
  
"Sprechen wir Deutsch? ((Are we speaking german?))"  
  
"Ich weiß nicht. Wie können wir erzählen? ((I dunno. How do we tell?))"  
  
"Ach Wartezeit! Leder hosen. ((Oh wait! Leather pants.))"  
  
They both giggled.   
  
-------------------------------  
  
"Wait a minute, aren't we supposed to be beating each other into a bloody pulp, tearing each others hearts through their noses..... or something?" Kaoru mused.  
  
The author sweatdropped. "How eloquently you put it. But, really, I didn't see the logic in a Matrix-style fight scene with a plunger and a twig."  
  
Megumi spoke up. "So what now, idiot?"  
  
The author was fuming now but spoke under her breath so she wouldn't hear.  
  
"Yes, yes, insult me now, Megumi. Soon I will ruin you all! I will invoke my army of Jigglypuff and you shall feel the pain of their bloody wrath! Yes, yes! Paining and wainings! Myy preccioouss........ No, no! Megumi is our friend! No! He betrays us! Nooo...."  
  
Then the author started to rock back and forth omn the floor. Lost in her own little world of insanity.  
  
"I can hear you, you know," Megumi said.  
  
"Dammit! Oh well. How about a drunken scene?"  
  
"What was that?"  
  
"Huh?" *smiles innocently* "Nothing, nothing....Hey Sagara! The drunken scene; you're up!"  
  
Sanosuke stumbled into the room, knocking over a vase. Somehow he managed to grab onto the wall for support, which was a miracle in itself because his eyes were glossed over. Did he even know where he was?  
  
"Heyeverybody....waz wit all the fightin'? Hmmmm??" Everyone rolled their eyes. He couldn't even speak without his words getting slurred!  
  
"Hey, hey. I got an idea......"  
  
Pause.  
  
Long pause.  
  
Super long pause.  
  
"How's about wez aaaaaalllllllllllll join hands and take. Take! A few drinks. TOGETHER! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!" he started to laugh uncontrollably, like Aoshi had just stripped naked and danced the mamba.  
  
"Here, here, Jou-chan! Take a drink. It's really good!"  
  
Several hours later....... they were hammered.  
  
-----------------------------------------  
  
A/n: Hehe! Forgive me if this sucks but I have to write a comedy, or an attempt at one. I've poured my freaking heart into 'Forbidden' and my brain's going to explode. Thanks to everyone who reviewed! I luv ya! Next chapter I plan to have a Rurouni Kenshin drinking game...... 


	5. Rabid Fangirl

Over The Edge - Chapter Four  
  
by  
  
Black Twilight  
  
--------------------  
  
((Last Time))  
  
"Here, here, Jou-chan! Take a drink. It's really good!"  
  
Several hours later....... they were hammered.  
  
--------------------  
  
"HAH HAH HAH! 10 bottles of sake on the wall... 23 bottles of..of...of...What are we drinking?"  
  
"SAKE!"  
  
"Yes, sake! I knew that.... you take a couple thousand or more... pass them to Sano... no more bottles of sake on the wall..." Sano sang cheerfully. They had been singing the same song for the last hour, but it never seemed to end. Maybe it was because they couldn't count, or maybe it was because one of them passed out after they reached 18. Take your pick.  
  
"Saannoo??" Megumi whined. He slowly turned his head, afraid that any other movement might kill him.  
  
"Yes'm, Fox?"  
  
"I got this...all...tingly feeling. Like...it tingles! You know? HAHAHAHA!"  
  
"That's because you're drunk, Fox!"   
  
With that they all clinked their glasses together; happy as three drunken clams. A few seconds later a frazzled looking Aoshi stepped into the dojo. His hair was in a mess, parts of twigs were embedded into it, his shirt torn off, his kodachis were stolen, and worst of all.....he was wearing a mamba outfit.   
  
"Where....is the closet?" He panted.  
  
Kaoru stupidly pointed her finger to the left and he immediately jumped into it. He opened the door slightly....  
  
"Oh, by the way, if Black Twilight comes looking for me, tell her I'm not here!" ...then closed it.  
  
The group of three grinned and pulled out lawnchairs, deciding to watch the show.  
  
"AOSHI-CHAN!!!!!!!!" a voice called. It was the beautiful author and Aoshi fangirl, Black Twilight!  
  
"Aoshi-chan! Oh!" she pouted. "Where is Aoshi-chan, Sano?"  
  
He grinned and turned her towards the closet, which was now whimpering. She yanked it open to find a terrified Oniwabanshuu member. But, she didn't care. He was H-O-T! She then proceeded to glomp him.  
  
"Oh, there you are! I got so worried! I love you so much Aoshi! I wrote a poem to confess my undying love! Here it is:  
  
...O freddled gruntbuggly thy micturations are to me  
  
As plured gabbleblochits on a lurgid bee.  
  
Groop, I implore thee my foonting turlingdromes.   
  
And hooptiously drangle me with crinkly bindlewurdles,  
  
Or I will rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurlecruncheon, see if I don't!!"  
  
------------------  
  
A/N: Aww Boredguy! I'm so sorry that you thinked that chapter four "wasnt that great." Oh well, it's not even supposed to be funny. I just keep typing and if someone enjoys this, then mnore power to 'em! Special thanks to RedLady for the opener and 'Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy' from which that awful 'declaration of love' was derived from. I said I'd have a drinking game but the girl still hasn't e-mailed me back with permission. *growls* Oh well......At least Aoshi is here and I get to stalk him! Kenshin comes in next. 


End file.
